Posts tagged dirty martini

I’m not starting til Monday! But….


  • Egg, 2 pieces wheat toast w/ butter and simply blueberry jam, four turkey sausage links
  • Honey almond butter and simply blueberry on wheat
  • Chocolate…  bacon cheese ball…  triscuits (those are healthy!)…
  • Dirty assed martini with extra olives (apparently olives are healthy, too.)


  • 2.5 mile Reilly walk
  • Nona League Practice

Oi.  Practice last night.  Nona ran a back to basics practice, that was full to the hilt and left me waking up with that train-wreck feeling.  I’ve only been a lazy slug since we went on derby break—Dec. 21.  If you don’t recall, I continued my workouts and ate mostly healthy through the 21st.  Why?  Well I had big exercise plans for break, but then I got sick, and then I got lazy, soo… yeah.

Anyway, 10 days off.  And in those 10 days, I hit a Speed Skating class, a Spin class, and a scrimmage.  So I wasn’t even that much of a lazy slug.

But fuck.  We did 50 laps, broken into 20-10-20 last night.  My back screamed at me the entire time.  I didn’t get winded at all, but my back was like “fuck you, fuck you, fuck you” with every stride.  Rowdy tried to save me–we tried to partner and lap each other at every corner.  It worked for about three laps, but there were too many other people lapping us also for us to maintain our pattern consistently.  I also got some nice encouragement from Gaygan and Pippi (so glad to have Pip back) which was nice, but I wasn’t feeling very tough last night.

Sooo… basically what I’m saying is, even though I’m a lazy fuck, I am excited about re-focusing on eating and exercising because I don’t like how I have been feeling lately.

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Mental Toughness–good for more than skating.

Food: 2572/2482

  • Jimmy Dean Turkey Sausage Muffin w/ coffee, Sugarfree Pumpkin Spice creamer, and a glass of milk.
  • Apple, Greek yogurt w/ fruit and granola, Naked Berry Blast, Luna Bar
  • VitaRain Sport, Ham and Reduced Fat Swiss on wheat with a banana and cottage cheese
  • Dove Dark Chocolate (just one!)
  • Leafy greens, cherry tomato, sugar snap pea, and imitation crab salad w/ light italian dressing
  • Dirty Martini


  • Long Reilly Walk
  • 1 hr Speed Skate Training
  • 25 mins agility circuits of death
  • 10 mins yoga stretching

I was counting my blessings yesterday because after practice I went for a drink with Tim and friends.  I had a dirty martini because it was a sports bar so I didn’t wanna be girly and order wine, but I also didn’t wanna drink a calorie loaded beer.  (There are 512 calories in 8oz vodka, btw, so that totally backfired.)  I drank my martini, then a large glass of water, then left when the wings, cheesy fries, nachos, etc arrived so as not to be tempted.  I was fine.  I may as well not have had anything to drink at all.  So I was driving home, through Highlands Ranch, in my workout clothes, at 11pm.

I saw him hiding out on a side street as I rounded the corner.  As soon as I saw him, I knew.  I was going to be pulled over.  I wasn’t speeding.  I wasn’t swerving.  I was driving perfectly.  Unfortunately, my driver’s side headlight is out.  I’ve been nagging Tim to fix it, but.  Well.  Men.  Ugh.  So he pulled me over.  My heart was racing.  I was panicing.  As I was fumbling through my “Insurance and Registration” folder from my glovebox, I did the same thing I did at the Sac City bout… without the Sith quote.  I said to myself: “Lindsay.  Relax.  You’re fine.  You’re not drunk.  And as long as you don’t look like you’re panicked, this is going to be a brief lecture about your headlight.  Relax.  If you look nervous, he’s getting the breathalizer out and then your’e fucked.  Calm.”

And I did.  And it was fine.  And I drove safely home.  I feel weird writing this.  I would never drive under the influence.  I’ve just heard stories about women and one drink, etc.  Plus… well.  If you eat healthy every day, then eat a loaded baked potato the day before a cholesterol test, you’re gonna have high cholesterol.  I think Blood-Alcohol measurements can be similarly distorted.  When Tim got home and we talked about it, he reassured me.  I was fine.  He even thought if I had been breathalized (which wouldn’t have happened anyway–I’d have told the SOB I wanted a blood test.  Which means they have to take you to a hospital which gives the alcohol time to burn out of your system. 😉 )  I would have been under both legal limits.  But I dunno.  That D.W.A.I. limit is pretty low.  Anyway, it was fucking close call and it was scary as shit.  And Pepa told me, and so did Titan and I know I need to get that thing fixed.  It’s just: the man’s the man, and that’s just the way it is.  Tim mows the lawn and takes care of the cars etc.  I go grocery shopping and buy his underwears.  Marriage is hard.  😉

The Speed Skating and Off Skates class last night was awesome.  I really don’t understand why it doesn’t count as a practice–not that it matters to me, but Dredna was there last night, and I know she’s tight on practices for the G&H bout next week.  Gaygan and Sweets are super cool.  They’re knowledgable and friendly and good at explaining things, easy to approach, they don’t judge, and well: they treat everyone equally.  Regardless of skill, attitude, whatever.  They’re good people.  I logged the activities into fitbit and it said I burned like 600+ calories last night.  I believe it.

I had one Dove Chocolate yesterday.  I was chatting with the night janitor, and gave him a few pieces, and “absentmindedly” grabbed one for myself.  (My conscience was screaming at me–“PUT THE CHOCOLATE DOWN!  DO NOT EAT THAT!” Until my tongue piped in with “sweet creamy glory…”  But when it was gone and I wasn’t satisfied, I did not grab another.  I had Sugarfree Pumpkin Spice creamer per Rowdy.  She had peppermint mocha the other day, so I scoured the grocery store creamer isles til I found the good sugarfree shit.  The first few sips tasted carboardy (consider–i’m comparing to Starbucks) but after that it was heaven.  So thanks, Rowds!  🙂  I packed a shit ton extra food in my lunch to avoid the chocolate.  It totally worked.  Jammed on that Luna bar when my assistant started eating Twix.  And water.  I had forgotten water Thursday.  Somehow that makes me less likely to eat.

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So much cheating.

Alright here goes:

  • Wednesday: 
    • Travel.  Honey Wheat Canadian Bacon Breakfast Sammie, Luna Bar(s?), almonds, dark chocolate cherry almond clusters, cheese, crackers, salami, mexican food–Shrimp Tacos.  Two margaritas.  Wine spritzers.
    • Airport walking, beach walk
  • Thursday:
    • Ehhh…  cheerios with milk.  luna bar… ?  Erm.  cheese, crackers, salami.  Wine Spritzer.  Wine.  Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, olives, cranberry sauces.  Wine.  Rum and Coke?  Cheesecake.  Hershey’s Chocolates.  Pumpkin Pie?
    • Tried the gym.  Soooo hot.  15 mins on bike, some weights.  Two beach walks
  • Friday: 
    • Soda. Turkey sandwich w/ mayo and cranberry sauce , Cheesecake, mashed potatoes, stuffing, gravy.  Cheerios w/ milk.  Rum and Coke, Rum and Coke, Rum and Coke.  Mini Caramel Ice Cream Cone.  Dirty Martini…  Fish tacos.  Chocolates. More cheesecake?
    • Beach “run.”  2 beach walks.  Snorkeling
  • Saturday: 
    • Bagel with butter, luna bar.  Soda. Turkey Sandwich w/ mayo, cranberry sauce.  Stuffing.  Cheesecake.  Rum and Coke.  Dirty Martini.  Filet mignon with horseradish sauce, green beans, and a loaded baked potato.  Sticky toffee pudding.  Dessert Wine.  Wine.  Wine.  Lots of chocolates.  Almonds?  Pepperoni.  Cheese.
    • More weights at the gym.  Some situps and pushups.  Diving!  First time.  I’m not certified.
  • Sunday:
    • Sunday Champagne Brunch.  Dear lord.  More food than you can imagine.  Brie.  Crackers.  Smoked Salmon.  Crab Claws.  Caviar.  Shrimp Cocktain.  Pot Stickers.  Sushi rolls.  French toast with butter and syrup.  Coconut pancake.  Egg Casserole.  Bacon.  Sausage.  More salmon and brie and crackers.  Hearts of Palm Salad.  Caprese Salad.  More brie and salmon and crackers.  OH.  Desserts.  I had prolly ten bite sized desserts.  Chocolate torte, mocha torte, strawberry short cake, keylime pie, strawberry cheesecake, pumpkin pie, lemon blueberry thing…  brownie.  Etc.  Etc. Etc. Champagne.  Lots of champagne.  Orange Juice.  Pizza.  Rum and Coke.
    • Yoga.  Too drunk to walk the beach.  😦
  • Monday: 
    • Turkey Sandwich again. Stuffing.  Mayo. Cranberry.  Bagel with butter.  Luna bar.  Lobster and Shrimp Penne Diavolo.  Coconut Shrimp.  Conch.  Chocolates.  Soda.  Rum and Coke.  Wine Spritzer.  Wine.  Dirty Martini.  Sticky Toffee Bread Pudding.  Tortilla chips and nacho cheese and salsa.
    • More diving.  Nighttime beach walk.  Lazy weights at the gym.
  • Tuesday: 
    • Eggs w/ buttered toast.  Luna bar.  Light V8 Splash.  Burger King Whopper Jr, cheeseburger, fries, and caramel sundae.  Rum and Coke.  Rum and Coke.  Rum and Coke.  …  Tortilla chips and nacho cheese and salsa. Rum and Coke.  Cuban Sammie in the airport.  Nom nom nom.  Ginger Ale.
    • Airport walking.  Georgetown Shopping walking.

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Calisthenics, etc.







  • Stale Honey Nut Cheerios & 1% milk, Coffee w/ Sugarfree Vanilla Creamer
  • Greek Yogurt w/ fruit and granola, Protein Chewy Bar, Apple
  • Ham and Swiss w/ Horseradish Mustard on “Stuffing Bread”  w/ banana and Fuze Slenderize
  • Beer…
  • Pastaroni w/ Tuna/Salmon (from a can) and peas.  Red wine.  Dirty Martini(s.)  Bleu Cheese Olives


  • Reilly Walk
  • “Calisthenics”
    • 50 push-ups (37 on toes)
    • 50 bicycle crunches
    • 25 ass lift crunches
    • 25 crunches
    • 3 x 20 Shoulder Lift Ab Crunchie things w/ 10lbs (each side)
    • 3 x 20 5lb. Bicep Curls
    • 3 x 20 10lb.Tricep Presses
    • 3 x 20 10lb.Upright Rows
    • 20 10lb. Rows
    • 2 x 10 10lb. Bow & Arrow things…
    • 2 x 12 10lb. Shoulder Press

It’s only one martini if the glass is never fully drained, correct?

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