Posts tagged newbies

I made you out of clay.

I have the Dreidel Song stuck in my head.  You too can share my misery, just click that link. Oh–and if you’re speculating: I’m not Jewish.  Not at all.

Food: 2607/2195

  • Quinoa bowl w/ walnuts, banana, and maple syrup.  Coffee and gloriously delicious Sugar free Pumpkin Spice Creamer.
  • Apple.  Greek yogurt w/ fruit and granola.  Banana.  Breakfast on the Go, Fruit and Berry Blend.
  • Chicken and Rice, Cranberry Orange Bread (courtesy of Colin’s mama,) VitaRain Sport
  • Cottage Cheese, Naked Might Mango.  Slice of thin crust frozen pizza.  
  • Chicken Breast, almond, mixed green, cherry tomato, sugar snap pea salad w/ Greek Yogurt, Pom, Red Wine Vinegar dressing.

Exercise:

  • Medium Reilly Walk
  • Practice

Yeah, so I was over on calories.  Should have, could have skipped that salad after practice. (461 calories–that would have put me where I’m supposed to be.) Conversely…  as Batty commented a few days ago: focus on eating better food, not less.  I think I’ve been doing that, but then last week when I didn’t have any snacks, I jammed on that chocolate.  Since then, I’ve been packing a shit ton of food in my lunches.  Like.  A shit ton.  My lunch suitcase needs wheels.  I would totally rock a rolling lunch suitcase.  Anyway, it’s working, and I don’t feel so badly when I eat good stuff.  I had one cheat item yesterday, but it could have been so much worse.  I had a slice of Colin’s mama’s Cranberry bread.  It was delicious and worth every one of those 120 calories.  

Gayg practice yesterday was excellent as usual.  I liked doing the Speed Skating laps instead of  like 100 laps in a pace line, or the lead for five laps version.  I doubt we did 100 laps yesterday, but we did quite a few, and it was challenging but mentally engaging as well, so that’s good.  Plus the passing piece kicks my competitive nature into overdrive so I didn’t sit out despite the throbbing back pain.   Really impressed with Saultz.  She was my partner yesterday, and she’s just returned from injury.  She hung in there like a champ.  I thought for sure she’d drop out, and was trying to keep her motivated to finish our lap together.  When we got back to the pack I expected her to sit out for a bit.  She didn’t.  She rolled on Gangnam Style.  It was B.A.  

Oh–also–Lops was my feedback buddy.  Totally scored the jackpot on that one.  She gives the best feedback and is sooo positive about it.  Lops is one of my most favorite league-team-mates.  I was really excited to be drafted to USPS for a number of reasons, and to be able to call a number of skaters “teammates” officially, but Lops was probably the one I was most excited about.  Simply because: she was at the War*house for my tryout, and her face lit up, she hugged me, and she was genuinely excited to see me there.  I was nervous and shitting my pants and there were other RMRG girls there who I knew better than Lops who were nonchalant at me, gave me a “what-the-fuck-are-you-doing-here?” look.  Well.  I was thinking to myself “what-the-fuck-are-you-doing-here?” and when I saw some girls I knew and they ignored me…I assumed that was what they were thinking as well.  Regardless, Lops was an encouraging face/body for me that day, and I needed it.  Plus she’s just the shit.  

So… yeah.  Pretty solid Monday.  Effectively avoiding the hordes of treats so far today.  

 

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Douche Baggery. Not so easily avoided.

Alright.  It’s time.  I don’t really want to write this post, cuz I’m gonna sound like a total cock.  But.  It needs to be done.

I love SheWho. Like.  Soooo much.  She wasn’t overly nice to me when I was new, but she showed up at a few Saturdays, and once I broke the ice she turned out to be the coolest mofo ever.

  1. She’s hilarious
  2. You can talk to SheWho about anything, she will always listen and never judge
  3. She’s fucking amazing at derby
  4. She has the endurance of a robot
  5. She treats everyone equally
  6. She goes to every practice, on time/early

Etc.  I started following SheWho around like a puppy dog.  I would sit by her, I would skate with her, I would do drills with her, and when I couldn’t do the footwork, I would get behind her and strait up copy her.

And then she “terminated her membership with RMRG.”  Talk about a dysphemism.  We all know a euphemism is a happy word in place of one that’s upsetting.  “I need to use the powder room” rather than “I need to take a massive dump.”  SheWho, on the other hand, didn’t “retire,” she “terminated her membership with.”  *Sigh.* I cried that night.  Literally.  I may have been (ok I was) a little (completely) drunk (wasted.)  But still. Sad day.

So after she quit, I posted a Help Wanted ad on my Facebook for a SheWho replacement.  Everyone liked it and giggled and haha’d it.  But I was serious, people.  I don’t fuck around.  Who am I going to follow now?  I’d tried following Rad Die, but it seemed to weird her out.  Gaygan and Sweets are awesome, but I’m still a ‘lil aloof with them.  Q didn’t jam (and is now gone–though she let me copy/follow her til I figured out backwards crossovers.)  Same for Ann Drogyny–er–Bob Loblaw.

So I was sad.  And a ‘lil depressed.  And I couldn’t figure out where to sit at practice, or who to stalk, and it took some adjusting.  That was August.  And I was freaking out about maintaining my Contender status.  Then I did.  No time for a sigh of relief, because we had an upcoming DRD bout and a travel bout to Sacramento.  I was going to do everything in my power to beat those glittery chicas (no offense intended–I say that endearingly.)  I did.  And we lost by, what, 4?  Same for Sacramento.  I did–and we won by 9!  And then I was a jamming machine for Sacred City, which was good, since Pippi was injured and our other main jammers exhausted from the night before.  Then we came home.

And I still don’t have a SheWho.  Anytime I think I’m close to finding one, I realize their practice attendance is not as good as mine, so they’re out.  Despite how amazing they are, for whatever reason, I take my practices seriously and I can’t have better attendance than my SheWho.  So now what?  It’s the “Off Season.”  I reflected on the past weeks/months.  Wow.  I have been really self-absorbed.  Derby-wise.  But…  I mean… I was trying to stay on Contenders, right?  I’m nobody, I’m not important, I’m just somebody who barely made Contenders twice.  So that’s fine, right?

And then I sorta looked at the big picture.  A year ago.  Last November.  I transferred to the Rocky Mountain Rollergirls from the Castle Rock ‘n Rollers.  I worshipped those girls.  Alice, SheWho, Pepa, Toxie, Q, Die, Nona, Lops, Pippi, Batty, etc, etc, etc.  I remember Nona pulling me aside one day to help me fix my derby stance, which had totally fucked up my back.  Coolest thing ever.

So… even if I’m just me.  Just barely a Contender…  I’m not.  In the scheme of things.  To the rest of the league, to the newbies, to the girls who’ve been here since December and haven’t quite Skills Tested yet.  I’m a Contender.  Period.  So.  I’ve been doing a disservice to those girls by being so self-absorbed, even if I don’t think what I have to say matters.  And then I realized–and this was a mind-fuck–I’ve become my own SheWho.  (This is where I sound like a total cock.)  There are so, so, so many girls to look up to on RMRG.  But nobody comes close to SheWho’s attendance.  Except me.  And I don’t even come close in numbers cuz SheWho had the added commitment of Fight Club practices.  (2 extra/ week.)

Now, granted, SheWho is way fucking cooler than me in my opinion.  But.  I think some people seem to think I’m pretty cool.  For whatever reason.  Maybe because I talk about dumps and booze on here all the time, who knows.  Maybe they’ve lost their minds (likely.)  So…  if I look at how much I worship SheWho, and, well.  Let’s say one person out there thinks I’m even half as cool as I think SheWho is…  and I’m all aloof and practicing my own shit.  Well that makes me about 10000x as much a cock as calling myself my own Who does.  So.  My goal til January 1: focus on others instead of myself.  Be more helpful to newer girls.  Be welcoming to transfers.  Etc.

You’d think this would be easy, right?  It’s not.  I feel so completely out of my element and douchey.  Fuck.  Last Sunday, we only had 6 skaters.  6 awesome skaters.  Who took over?  This girl.  Monday: Die was teaching bridging, and we split into two groups.  Who took over the second group? (The one Die wasn’t supervising?)  This girl.  I’m not trying to take over.  I’m not trying to be bossy.  I don’t think I know everything and I know I’m not the best skater and have sooo much room to grow.  It’s just…  we haven’t seen FC much lately, and when we do, it’s at Sundays.  No one else is stepping up and someone has to.  And if I’m truly focusing on helping others improve…  maybe I should be stepping up a little?  I don’t know.  It feels so weird to me.

And last night.  Five transfers being evaluated, and again, the newer skaters are more noticeable b/c FC is on a break (which is great–this time is a great time to focus on improving one’s own skills.)  I couldn’t figure out how to not be a douche in the three-wall drill.  As a jammer.  I am completely average as a jammer.  But with new girls who haven’t been exposed to the techniques we’ve been practicing lately…  I slid right though.  Again and again.  I was just trying to work on a bit of footwork, looking for holes, etc, while they did the wall.  But they asked me to you know.  Go through less.  Be less douchey. (They didn’t say that, that’s my own add-on.)  So then I skated left, right, left.  Which seemed less douchey for that drill, but in another situation might be douchey?  I just don’t know.

Lastly… there’s like.  Committees that need heading and some BOD positions and we need a Conts. Captain.  I don’t really want to do any of those things.  I don’t think I’m the right person to do any of those things.  But maybe I will.  We’ll see.

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Ah-HA!

Food: 1758/1854

  • Frosted Mini Wheats w/ 1% Milk, Coffee, Sugarfree vanilla half and half
  • Apple, Yoplait Greek w/ Nature’s Valley Granola and Fruit
  • Greek Yogurt Chicken Salad Sandwich on wheat, VitaRain Sport, Banana
  • Chicken Breast & Colby Jack Panini on Sourdough, 1% milk

Exercise:

  • Reilly walk
  • Cruelie Practice

Finally stayed under my caloric intake.  One bonus of living so far away from the War*house: I leave at 4:30/4:45, I get home at 8:45/9:45.  Good practice last night.  Lots of new transfers to play with.

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Positive Attitude!

Food: 2177/2077

  • Frosted miniwheats, 1% milk, coffee, sugarfree vanilla creamer
  • Yoplait Greek w/ fruit and granola, apple
  • Chicken breast, wheat bread, olive oil mayo, colby jack cheese, mustard sammie, Diet Dr. Pepper, salad & Ken’s honey mustard dressing
  • *cough* red-velvet-cake *cough* carrot-cake *COUGH COUGH* red-velvet-whoopie-pie-bite *acheewww*
  • Peppermint Stick Luna Bar
  • Beer.

Exercise:

  • Reilly walk
  • 2hr Die Practice

Actually moderately eventful Monday.  Discovered both cheese and mayo to be evil at lunch.  (Mayo = 100 calories, cheese = 135 calories.  Ugh.) Also, I *really* need to take my own advice and mix up some homemade salad dressing to keep on store for salad eating occasions.  (Ken’s Honey Mustard = 130 calories.  UGH.)  There was Red Velvet and Carrot Cake at lunch.  Mondays are Colin’s mom treat days, so I had a bite of each, thinking they were the homemade treats.  The Red Velvet immediately disappointed (stale, clearly boxed) so I threw it out.  I rocked some Carrot Cake though.  Then Colin came in with a tin of Red Velvet Whoopie Pies.  Fuck.  They were like Little Debbie’s Oatmeal Cream Pies  for adults.  Just needed some liquor.  Or wine.  Anyway, I had 1/4 of one just to taste it.  It was bliss.  Too bad I’d already wasted my treat calories on Carrot Cake.  (You’ll notice Mayo, Cheese, and Honey Mustard are evil, but apparently 250 calories of Red Velvet Cake and 280 of Carrot Cake are not.  Priorities, I say.)

Practice.  Awesome.  Die is the shit.  She took all of the everything from the forum and put it together into one super awesome practice.  She even threw in some bridging since I’d suggested working on it after practice for the ppl who didn’t want to do Off Skates training during practice time.  My goal for now is to help the newbs, and focus on that rather than my own skills.  I’m definitely there, but I’m worried I may be overdoing it.  We split into two groups for bridging, and I sort of organized the group Die wasn’t managing…  there were other more qualified skaters in the group, too… so hopefully it’s cool I did that.  StarFry seemed to “get” bridging better afterward, so if that’s one outcome, I guess it was okay.  I dunno.  I just don’t wanna be bossy or take over when I shouldn’t be… but I also had this realization the other day… oh this should be another post.  I’ll make it another post.  Blah.

After practice Titan suggested we go out for Beers, so we did!  We went to this cool place called “Prost.”  It reminded me of the Lowry Beer Garden, it was really cool and fun, and I was able to go b/c today is Election Day and Legend is a Polling Place so no students, and no students = I don’t have to be here at 6:30!  Yaya.

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