Archive for November, 2012

One Word

“One Word”
Kelly Osbourne

One word breaks the code of silence,
Silence tells me all I need to know.
One Word,
One Word, tells me everything I need to know.

One world driven in to madness,
Madness driven by the depths below.
One Word,
One Word, tells me everything I need to know

It’s not the way that I want it,
It’s just the way that I need it.
Day after day
It’s not the way that I want it,
It’s just the way that I need it.
Day after day

One lie tells a thousand stories,
The greatest stories that were ever told.
One Lie,
One Lie, tells the greatest stories ever told.

One man can predict the future,
a future journey in to outer space.
One Man,
One Man, a future journey in to outer space.

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Daily Fitbit stats

My fitbit #fitstats for 11/29/2012: 15,789 steps and 7.2 miles traveled.

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Buckling Down. Again. For realz this time. No–really.

Food: 2271/ 1772 ¬†ūüė¶¬†

  • Turkey Sausage Sammie w/ 1% milk, coffee, sugarfree vanilla creamer
  • Apple, Yoplait Greek w/ Fruit and Granola
  • … ¬†Two Dove Dark Chocolates.
  • … ¬†Two mini KitKat bars…
  • Two more Dove Dark Chocolates.
  • Ham and light swiss on wheat. ¬†Naked Green Machine (10 oz). ¬†1% Cottage Cheese.
  • … four more Dove Dark Chocolates (Karen put them in my hand–not my fault! ¬†Ok she put three in my hand. ¬†They were gone before I tasted them, so I needed one more…)
  • Giant Leafy Greens salad w/ cherry tomatoes, sugar snap peas, imitation crab meat and light italian dressing with 1% milk


  • 1 mile walk w/ Reilly
  • Spin Class

Ugh. ¬†I need to do some yoga. ¬†After 9 days with virtually no exercise, my legs are tight and sore after spinning. I’m just so tired. ¬†ūüė¶ I may yet rally. ¬†We’ll see. ¬†It would burn more calories which would increase my caloric intake which I (of course) exceeded.

Then again I’ve got about 500 calories worth of chocolate in there. ¬†*Sigh* ¬†I didn’t really try to resist them. ¬†They are in the library now. ¬†On my desk. ¬†Staring at me. ¬†Calling to me, saying “I am your favorite kind of chocolate. ¬†Think how creamy and delicious I am. ¬†You know you love me more than Hershey’s dark chocolate, because I am Dove Dark chocolate and I melt in your mouth.” ¬†So then I put one in my mouth and suck to feel it melt away whist coating my tongue in its chocolate glory, dissolving to delicious nothingness. ¬†But then I get greedy and want more chocolatey goodness so I bite into it–another wonderful sensation altogether–and chew and swallow it’s creamy glory. ¬†Then I’m sad I didn’t let it dissolve so I try again. ¬†Same failure. ¬†I should give up. ¬†(You really need to eat those things with a good Pinot Noir anyway, or it’s a complete waste.)

I commented on the hardship of chocolate accessibility on facebook today, and Dosa and Sunny are agreed to continue this TBT hell another two weeks, so I said fuck it and jumped on that bandwagon, too. ¬†At least we’ll be miserable (and skinny bitches) together. ¬†Rowdy I’ve noticed has responded with “likes” and amused comments, but no affirmation of another two weeks. ¬†Piper and Newt are completely ignoring us crazies, though. (Can’t say I blame them.) ¬†Anyway, December 15th. ¬†We can make it.

I have to say, though, if I’m going through this misery another two weeks, Ima fucking do this shit right. ¬†No more damn chocolate all day long. ¬†No more cheat-kends or full cheat days. ¬†I’m not gonna say no cheating, because that’s a recipe for disaster, but I don’t want to go all out ever. ¬†That’s what got me off the bandwagon in the first place. ¬†So cheat meals or cheat treats. ¬†Maybe like one a day. ¬†One glass of wine or one chocolate or if it’s a “cheat day,” one meal or one six pack. ¬†No going nuts. Something like that. ¬†We’ll see how it goes.

As I was warming up for Spin Class this evening, perusing the December Fitness Guide, looking at all the classes I might be able to attend during finals week (when we have half days at school) or during my two week break, I thought “maybe I should TBT another three weeks–til December 21!” ¬†And about 25 minutes later when the sweat started pouring and my legs started shaking I realized that was the crazy talking. ¬†The point is to change habits and move forward positively. ¬†Exercising more. ¬†Eating healthier and less. ¬†Managing those extra “empty” calories. ¬†I’m going longer because I don’t think I’m there yet. ¬†I’m giving myself an extra two weeks to get there. ¬†To remind myself what empty calories can do and that I am capable of avoiding them.

Before this TBT, I didn’t exercise outside of derby. ¬†I won’t stop when TBT is over, and I shouldn’t. ¬†Continuing to exercise after TBT ends doesn’t mean I should extend TBT–I shouldn’t. ¬†I should move forward with these new habits I’ve taught myself. ¬†After the 15th, though, I will be done with this “dieting” bullshit. ¬†I fucking hate it. ¬†Hate. ¬†Loathe. ¬†Ughhh. ¬†But it’s good for me, and I need to learn to manage my caloric intake better.

I think that’s all for now.

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Chocolate Layer Bars

In terms of bogs not to follow during TBT, totally heads the list. I’ve got about nine posts just like this one in my feed. Killing me. ¬†In terms of delicious looking food. ¬†Holy dear lord I want to make everything on this site.

Can't Stay Out of the Kitchen

Teresa‚Äôs Bake Shop ‚Äď Christmas Cookie edition ‚Äď 2012

I love these spectacular chocolate bars. Even while I was cutting them I could smell the wonderful fragrance of almond extract and, of course, chocolate! They have a sugar cookie-type crust, a chocolate filling made with cream cheese, diced walnuts, and almond extract. Then the topping is made from the same ingredients as the crust only crumbled on top like streusal.

We love these amazing bar-type cookies. I found the recipe in a magazine years ago and have made several modifications to it to get it exactly the way we like them. Unfortunately, when I typed the recipe into my cookbook back in the early 1980s I failed to note where the recipe originated from. We have made this recipe several times for our Christmas Cookie Extravaganza. I’ve also made it lots of times whenever I wanted a delicious dessert to…

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So yesterday.

Oi. ¬†So I weighed in this morning at 154.1, not bad considering. ¬†Unfortunately, to get back to my 150lb goal… ¬†I’m at a 2000 calorie defecit and if I do that I might make it back up by 12/14. ¬†Ugh. ¬†So.

Food: 2561/1156 

  • Jimmy Dean Turkey Sausage and Egg White Muffin w/ Chocolate Raspberry Luna Bar
  • Lipton Raspberry Iced Tea (my “oops” for the day) Sugar Snap Pea, Naked Blue Machine Smoothie
  • Ham and Swiss panini on white bread w/ mustard, 1% milk, salad and light italian dressing
  • Luna Chocolate Raspberry Bar, Milk
  • Steak & Cheese Burritos w/ sour cream and salsa, red wine


  • Yeah. ¬†I skipped practice. ¬†And by the time Tim got Reilly home it was cold and I didn’t want to walk her. ¬†Went to bed at 7:45. ¬†Still on “Island Time” I guess.

So I don’t know what to do. ¬†I’m clearly failing to reduce enough calories to get back to 150. ¬†And my goal was more about fitness, right. ¬†So. ¬†I can extend my TBT by 2 weeks to make up for slacker time and see where I get. ¬†Or. ¬†End it tomorrow with everyone else and enjoy my December and all the winter treats. ¬†

Decisions, decisions.  Ugh.   

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Daily Fitbit stats

My fitbit #fitstats for 11/28/2012: 7,292 steps and 3.3 miles traveled.

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So much cheating.

Alright here goes:

  • Wednesday:¬†
    • Travel. ¬†Honey Wheat Canadian Bacon Breakfast Sammie, Luna Bar(s?), almonds, dark chocolate cherry almond clusters, cheese, crackers, salami, mexican food–Shrimp Tacos. ¬†Two margaritas. ¬†Wine spritzers.
    • Airport walking, beach walk
  • Thursday:
    • Ehhh… ¬†cheerios with milk. ¬†luna bar… ? ¬†Erm. ¬†cheese, crackers, salami. ¬†Wine Spritzer. ¬†Wine. ¬†Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, corn, olives, cranberry sauces. ¬†Wine. ¬†Rum and Coke? ¬†Cheesecake. ¬†Hershey’s Chocolates. ¬†Pumpkin Pie?
    • Tried the gym. ¬†Soooo hot. ¬†15 mins on bike, some weights. ¬†Two beach walks
  • Friday:¬†
    • Soda. Turkey sandwich w/ mayo and cranberry sauce , Cheesecake, mashed potatoes, stuffing, gravy. ¬†Cheerios w/ milk. ¬†Rum and Coke, Rum and Coke, Rum and Coke. ¬†Mini Caramel Ice Cream Cone. ¬†Dirty Martini… ¬†Fish tacos. ¬†Chocolates. More cheesecake?
    • Beach “run.” ¬†2 beach walks. ¬†Snorkeling
  • Saturday:¬†
    • Bagel with butter, luna bar. ¬†Soda. Turkey Sandwich w/ mayo, cranberry sauce. ¬†Stuffing. ¬†Cheesecake. ¬†Rum and Coke. ¬†Dirty Martini. ¬†Filet mignon with horseradish sauce, green beans, and a loaded baked potato. ¬†Sticky toffee pudding. ¬†Dessert Wine. ¬†Wine. ¬†Wine. ¬†Lots of chocolates. ¬†Almonds? ¬†Pepperoni. ¬†Cheese.
    • More weights at the gym. ¬†Some situps and pushups. ¬†Diving! ¬†First time. ¬†I’m not certified.
  • Sunday:
    • Sunday Champagne Brunch. ¬†Dear lord. ¬†More food than you can imagine. ¬†Brie. ¬†Crackers. ¬†Smoked Salmon. ¬†Crab Claws. ¬†Caviar. ¬†Shrimp Cocktain. ¬†Pot Stickers. ¬†Sushi rolls. ¬†French toast with butter and syrup. ¬†Coconut pancake. ¬†Egg Casserole. ¬†Bacon. ¬†Sausage. ¬†More salmon and brie and crackers. ¬†Hearts of Palm Salad. ¬†Caprese Salad. ¬†More brie and salmon and crackers. ¬†OH. ¬†Desserts. ¬†I had prolly ten bite sized desserts. ¬†Chocolate torte, mocha torte, strawberry short cake, keylime pie, strawberry cheesecake, pumpkin pie, lemon blueberry thing… ¬†brownie. ¬†Etc. ¬†Etc. Etc. Champagne. ¬†Lots of champagne. ¬†Orange Juice. ¬†Pizza. ¬†Rum and Coke.
    • Yoga. ¬†Too drunk to walk the beach. ¬†ūüė¶
  • Monday:¬†
    • Turkey Sandwich again. Stuffing. ¬†Mayo. Cranberry. ¬†Bagel with butter. ¬†Luna bar. ¬†Lobster and Shrimp Penne Diavolo. ¬†Coconut Shrimp. ¬†Conch. ¬†Chocolates. ¬†Soda. ¬†Rum and Coke. ¬†Wine Spritzer. ¬†Wine. ¬†Dirty Martini. ¬†Sticky Toffee Bread Pudding. ¬†Tortilla chips and nacho cheese and salsa.
    • More diving. ¬†Nighttime beach walk. ¬†Lazy weights at the gym.
  • Tuesday:¬†
    • Eggs w/ buttered toast. ¬†Luna bar. ¬†Light V8 Splash. ¬†Burger King Whopper Jr, cheeseburger, fries, and caramel sundae. ¬†Rum and Coke. ¬†Rum and Coke. ¬†Rum and Coke. ¬†… ¬†Tortilla chips and nacho cheese and salsa. Rum and Coke. ¬†Cuban Sammie in the airport. ¬†Nom nom nom. ¬†Ginger Ale.
    • Airport walking. ¬†Georgetown Shopping walking.

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A picture from my parents’ balcony…

Have a great week and enjoy your turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie!

…I’ll be enjoying the beach. ¬†ūüėÄ

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Ponytails and Cocktails: two things that will always rock.


  • Honey Nut Cheerios, milk, coffee, sugarfree vanilla creamer
  • Yoplait greek w/ fruit and granola, Coconut Luna Bar, almonds
  • Subway turkey and ham w/ avocado on wheat, all the veggies, honey mustard (no cheese!)
  • Handfulls and handfulls and handfulls of homemade carmel corn. ¬†So much all my teeth rot out after my fillings fell out. ¬†Sooooo good.
  • banana… dark chocolate cherry almond clusters…
  • Chicken Cordon Bleu w/ steamed brussel sprouts, rye bread, and wine. ¬†(And Flexeril.)


  • Longish Reilly walk

My back has been bugging me all day, progressively worse as the day’s worn on. ¬†So I’m mixing a flexeril wine cocktail. ¬†Fucking badass. ¬†My liver prolly doesn’t like it though… Skipped practice tonight. ¬†With the back and needing to pack… ¬†prolly a good decision. ¬†It’s a good thing Frida’s off the TBT or she’d be giving me a beating for sure. ¬†ūüėČ


So, yeah. ¬†Needless to say I’m basically off the TBT wagon. ¬†Ugh. ¬†I’ve worked so hard and done sooo well I don’t want to fuck it all up now! ¬†So close. ¬†Conversely… ¬†my original goals are centered on derby improvement, physical strength, drinking more water, etc. ¬†I’m doing great there. ¬†It’s just I’ve been drinking more, eating pizza, and gaining a few lbs. ¬†We’ll see how it goes.

In other news… ¬†my badass Bijou bruise? ¬†The one I refused to Arnicare b/c I wanted Bijou to see it? ¬†Yeah. ¬†Black and giant. ¬†And I’m rocking the bikini in two days. ¬†Fuuuuck. ¬†Why don’t I ever plan ahead? ¬†Oh well.

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Food: 2581

  • 2 eggs w/ buttered stuffing bread toast
  • Cliff Shot Bloks
  • Swiss cheese, reduced fat cream cheese, and chicken breast on wheat bread with cottage cheese and a beer
  • Smoked salmon on reduced fat cream cheese triscuits
  • Pizza Rolls… ¬†Chicken Nuggets… ¬†bottle of red wine…


  • 2 hr scrimmage
  • long Reilly walk
  • Yoga stretching

OMG my body aches. ¬†My back and my legs. ¬†ūüė¶ ¬†I took an epsom salt bath, did some yoga-ish stretching, and sat w/ a heating pad on my back. ¬†It felt fan-fucking-tastic. ¬†Probably should have foregone some of the liquid calories, but I didn’t beat myself up about it too bad at the time. ¬†Probably should have. ¬†The bottle of wine was gone before I really realized there was a dent in it. ¬†Ooops.

My weekends have been a little calorically crazy lately, and the result was that this morning the scale said 152.3. ¬†This is really messing with my vacation plans. ¬†There’s a nice gym there, but going to it would seriously cut into my already limited beach time. ¬†*Sigh.* ¬†In other news, despite how much I ache, I will force myself to go to practice tonight, since I will be missing over a week. ¬†And probably something tomorrow, too.

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