Posts tagged NABLOPOMO

Four Gunshot Blasts

“Four gunshot blasts that, all told, ended six human lives…”

 

This is not the opening of my favorite book.  It’s not even the opening of a book, really.  It’s the last sentence in the first chapter of In Cold Blood, which is one of the books I used to teach.

It is so telling, that sentence.  Everything that happens in the book, the reader learns right there, in that sentence.  Moreover, though, the author’s bias steeps into his own story here…  I love Truman Capote.  I find him fascinating.  Ever since I first met him, in the 8th grade, as the character “Dill” in To Kill a Mockingbird… or… didn’t you know that?  Truman Capote and Harper Lee are childhood best friends.  He helped her research and write To Kill a Mockingbird (some argue the first pages of it are Capote’s writing–I may agree) and she aided him in his research of In Cold Blood.

That precocious, inquisitive little run away in To Kill a Mockingbird… he grew into a fabulous writer.  Perhaps his most famous work is Breakfast at Tiffany’s, but it comes nowhere near rivaling In Cold Blood in terms of depth, bredth, or impact on society.  With In Cold Blood, Capote invented a new genre of writing… though I don’t think he started out intending to.  He created the “nonfiction novel.”  A nonfiction story that reads like fiction.  Modern examples include the writing of Erik Larson– Devil in the White City, and In the Garden of Beasts. 

I digress.

That line “Four gunshot blasts that, all told, ended six human lives.”   I remember the first time I read it. Wow.  I had no idea how the story would unfold, only that the story was about the brutal murders of a helpless family of four… six must include the killers.  How interesting that the author includes their deaths…

But then, when I first read those words, I had no idea the complexities Capote had discovered regarding the relationship of those murderers.  Going so far as to reference a psychologist’s case study of them. In short: neither could have committed murder independently.  Together, their personalities meshed, creating a third, murderous personality.  It was a senseless slaying.  They went to the Clutter’s home seeking money.  They found none.  So they murdered the entire family. What is there to be sympathetic about?  And yet, sympathy Capote did find.

It nearly ruined him.  Capote could not publish his book until the sentencing was carried out for the murderers.  And yet… Capote funded their defense. After In Cold Blood published, Capote reached the height of fame.  And he never finished another book… he also struggled with alcoholism and drug abuse.

My theory?  He fell in love with one of the murderers.  He felt compassion for a murderer whom he saw as a victim.  Fascinating.  Truly fascinating.  When Capote could not save Perry from the Death Penalty…  he lost himself as well.  Everyone wonders why Harper Lee never wrote another book?  Well.  What if she never wrote a book to begin with?

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Protected: Daily Prompt: Revisionist History

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MMMBop

Food: 2096 (My suggested Caloric intake is so relative I’m going to start leaving it off.  I was “over” yesterday (by 500.))

  • Frosted Mini Wheats/Stale Honey Nut Cheerios & 1% milk, coffee w/ sugarfree vanilla creamer
  • Greek Yogurt w/ fruit and granola, apple
  • Rosemary Ham and Baby Swiss sammie w/ Stoneground Horseradish Mustard, Cottage Cheese, VitaRain Sport
  • Salmon, Salad w/ Greek Yogurt, Honey, OJ dressing, 1% milk
  • Red Wine

Exercise:

  • Reilly Walk
  • Practice

Unnnggghhhh.  Yesterday was blah.  I had this thing in the morning where my head got all hot and I sneezed a lot.  Then I was freezing all day and had to wear my coat.  Which is annoying.  (Now I am all hot again this morning.)  Practice was blah.  Good drills, great to have Gaygan and Sweets back, but it just didn’t do it for me.  Probably because we skated 25 laps the wrong direction on the outside of the track (we were supposed to do 15, but kept going) and my back knotted up so bad I had to sit out.  Which of course I was hard on myself about.  I tried hard to stay in, and I tried hard to cheer everyone else on, but my back put it’s foot down and said “fuh kew.”

Food.  I was over.  When I hit slightly below 150lbs, Fitbit altered my suggested Caloric Intake to increase my weight to 150 (because 150 was my target weight).  So I reset to a goal of 145, with a due date of Nov 27.  It has me at a 750 daily caloric deficit now.  I’ve been toying w/ the idea of changing the goal again, but I want to see if that Steak and Lobster dinner works itself off first (otherwise I’ll just be re-resetting.)  Anyway, I’m about 500 calories over the 750 defecit, so I technically consumed 250 calories less than I burned yesterday….  I guess. Totally needed a glass of Red Wine when I got home.  I was kicking my puppy right in its teeth.  The wine didn’t help.  I had weird dreams last night, too.

Salad dressing–I read a recipe for Orange Balsamic Salad Dressing a while ago, and was in a hurry yesterday and couldn’t remember all the ingredients.  So I just threw OJ, Honey, and Greek Yogurt in a dish and mixed them.  Some balsamic vinegar definitely would have increased the flavor.  I miss cooking and posting recipes and food photos on here.  😦  Maybe I will do that after TBT.

*Photo from Can’t Stay Out of the Kitchen

Yesterday on the way to practice I was sick of listening to all my music, so I went with a playlist I never listen to.  The Hanson playlist.  Loved them. Everyone always ragged on them, and I get it, but I still like this song and the lyrics.  So I was actually thinking about posting these lyrics before the Daily Prompt was to title your blog with a song lyric.  Anyway:

“You have so many relationships in this life
Only one or two will last
You go through all the pain and strife
Then you turn your back and they’re gone so fast
And they’re gone so fast,
So hold on the ones who really care
In the end they’ll be the only ones there
And when you get old and start losing your hair
Can you tell me who will still care?”

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If you really want more, scream it out louder

“If you really want more, scream it out louder”

This is my Derby Jam.  I had Batty and Scream play it when I did my 20 laps, I play it before every bout, and it usually comes on my iPod when I’m merging from I-225 to I-70 on the way to practice.  I really started listening to it when I made Contenders.  I was worried I’d screw up that opportunity, so I just kept telling myself to work at it.  If you really want more, scream it out louder.  Get on the floor, bring out the fire.  Light it up, take it up higher.

I also like the second part of the first verse–“Know you’ve been patiently waiting, I know you need me, I can feel it, I’m a beast, I’m an animal, I’m that monster in the mirror, the headliner, finisher, closer, winner, best when under pressure with seconds left I show up.”  If you just read the lyrics and look at what a cock Usher is, he’s talking about how he’s so awesome at dancing.  But for me, it means this opportunity was meant for me.  And here I am, and I’m not gonna let anyone down.  And the last part there, I always look at Fight Club winning WFTDA Nationals in 2010.  One point.  Frida Beater.  Sure, that was everyone’s victory.  But, Frida totally could have fucked that up.  She didn’t.  She secured a win.  I always wonder what would happen to me in a similar situation.  I think I would crack under pressure.  So singing these lyrics at myself, constantly telling myself I’m the finisher, is my way of preparing myself for the event my team needs a tight victory and I’m on the line.  (It almost happened at the Fillmore DRD bout, but Alpha pulled me and put other skaters in instead. It did happen at Sac City, but I was blocking, not jamming, so not the same.)

“More” by Usher

“Watch me as I dance under the spotlight-
listen to the people screaming out more, and more
Cos I create the feeling that keep em coming back,
Yeah, I create the feeling that keep em coming back,
So captivating when I get it on the floor.

Know y’all been patiently waiting, I know you need me, I can feel it,
I’m a beast, I’m an animal, I’m that Monster in the mirror,
The headliner, finisher, I’m the closer, winner.
Best when under pressure with seconds left I show up.

If you really want more, scream it out louder,
if you on the floor, bring out the fire,
And light it up, take it up higher,
Gonna push it to the limit, give it more.

Get up both your hands, I’m in the zone, s’aite
put em in the air, if you more (and) more,
Cos I can’t wait to feel it.
I go hard, can’t stop,
But if I stop just know that Imma bring it back,
Never quittin’ don’t believe in that.

Know y’all been patiently waiting, I know you need me, I can feel it,
I’m a beast, I’m an animal, I’m that monster in the mirror,
The headliner, finisher, I’m the closer, winner.
Best when under pressure with seconds left I show up.

If you really want more, scream it out louder,
if you on the floor, bring out the fire,
And light it up, take it up higher,
Gotta push it to the limit, give it more.

Ooooooooo….
Gotta push it to the limit, give it more..
Ooooooooo….

If you really want more, scream it out louder,
if you on the floor, bring out the fire,
And light it up, take it up higher,
Gotta push it to the limit, give it more.

Ooooooooo….
Gotta push it to the limit, give it more..
Ooooooooo….

Gotta push it to the limit, give it more.”

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