Posts tagged hershey’s special dark

But why is the rum gone?!

Food: 2647/2022

  • Honey Nut Cheerios w/ banana and Almond Milk.  Coffee & Sugar Free Carmel Macchiato Creamer
  • Apple, Yoplait Greek w/ Fruit and Granola
  • Greek Yogurt Tuna on wheat w/ spinach. Red bell pepper slices.
  • Cheesy Penne with Broccoli and Chicken, salad w/ light balsamic vinegar, triscuits
  • Almond Snickers… a bite of Misto’s delicious Peanut Butter Chocolate protein bar (that was more deliciously satisfying than the Almond Snickers…)
  • PB & Hershey’s Special dark on wheat…
  • wine!

Exercise:

  • 50 toe push ups
  • 50+ sit ups (25 leg lifts, 25 cobras, some at practice)
  • 2hr Thursday Misto Practice
  • 1hr Sugar “scrimmage.”

I know it was a good practice when I get home and fitbit tells me I have 15,000+ steps.  Scrimmage days I get like no steps, so it wasn’t the hour-ish scrimmage-ish.  Double practice school nights I’m usually around 11,000.  The only times I hit 15,000 are when I have spin class and walk Reilly.

I really need to get on track with my eating.  I jammed on a Snicker’s yesterday.  And fro-yo with lunch.  Bad Mean@$$.  My skinny jeans don’t feel so hot this morning.  😦  I’ve got tummy overhang.  And I could easily have cut out the 600+ calories I’m over from yesterday (the frozen yogurt, the snickers, and the PB& Hershey’s on wheat…)

I’m hitting Costco this weekend.  Misto said she got the choco-peanut butter protein bar there, so I’ll grab some, as well as some other healthy snacks.  I just need to focus.  Balance is also a goal and unfortunately gets in the way sometimes.  So, balance with a focus on diet.

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The Vascillation Cont-inues…

Food:

  • Honey Nut Cheerios w/ Almond Milk, banana, coffee w/ SugarFree Caramel Macchiato creamer
  • Apple, Greek yogurt w/ fruit and granola
  • Subway turkey w/ avocado, all the veggies, no cheese, honey mustard, MOR carbonated water, Parmesan Sun Chips
  • Dove Dark Chocolates.  Hershey’s Special Dark.
  • Pork Chop w/ BBQ sauce, garlic triscuits, Crystal Light
  • 2 Diet Cokes
  • Bag of M&Ms
  • Oreos and Milk.  Real 1% milk.
  • Wine.

Exercise:

  • 50 toe pushups
  • 25 cobras, 25 v-ups
  • Lunch Walk, Stair Climb, etc.

I had a great day yesterday.  I worked 14hrs.  (6:45am-8:45pm. Basketball Clock.)  I really enjoyed everyone’s old school derby photos and the stories that went with them.  Plus it was cool how everyone positively responded to my idea.  By the end of the day, when Gaygan told the derby world to join us, I was beaming and felt like a total badass.  I went home and told Tim all about it.  And Tim was proud of me, too, and posted a picture from my actual first bout.  On my drive home, I felt certain the influx of chocolate would surely end, now that I recognize my own badassery.  Alas.  It was not to be.  😉

Because I had a busy day, I took a walk during my lunch break.  I felt naughty and kept looking over my shoulder.  (At one point the school’s security golf cart did take off from the school in my direction…)  Other than that… it was great!  I walked about…  2-3 miles?  I wanted to get my 10,000 steps in yesterday, even though I’d be working all day.  Then during basketball, I walked up and down the main hallway stairs between games and at halftimes.  I not only achieved 10,000+ steps, I also climbed 40 floors (a personal best, I think, and I didn’t even have to climb up to Dr. Borman’s office!)

Oh–Almond Milk for breakfast.  Apparently dairy is bad for me.  I have a consultation w/ Cruelie coming up, and I think she will say it is bad…  Sunny seems in agreement.  So I bought Almond Milk to try it out.  It was fine on my cereal until I got to the bottom and tried to drink it.  Okay, I succeeded in drinking it but it was all thick and creamy like whole milk and ew.  EWWWWW.

Anyway, so I went to bed feeling a total badass and then I woke up all bleeeehhhhhgh again.  *Sigh.*  This is getting so old.  It’s draining.  Regulate, damn it.  Maybe if I stop eating chocolate all day long.  I emailed Sweets asking her to help me prioritize my derby goals.  I start one and never master it then work on something new, etc.  Plus Blew & I need a Cont training plan, so I’d like some help with that.  Maybe prioritizing will help and I won’t feel so “what’s the point.”

I would argue the only person I see working harder than me is Sweets herself.  That doesn’t mean everyone else isn’t doing it, just that’s what I see at practice.  She’s also there early, but she does more than roll around aimlessly.  She also focuses on drills, etc.  So it’s hard feeling like I work harder than a bunch of people that just moved above me.  And I got this “Most Improved” award, right?  And everyone thinks that means I’m doing well.  Well.  Based on the current layout of things, I think it means I must have really really sucked a year ago and I’m “meh” now.

Everyone else thinks I’m a badass.  Why can’t I?  Or, I do… for a bit…  then I just don’t see it anymore.  Why is it so fleeting?

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Buckling Down. Again. For realz this time. No–really.

Food: 2271/ 1772  😦 

  • Turkey Sausage Sammie w/ 1% milk, coffee, sugarfree vanilla creamer
  • Apple, Yoplait Greek w/ Fruit and Granola
  • …  Two Dove Dark Chocolates.
  • …  Two mini KitKat bars…
  • Two more Dove Dark Chocolates.
  • Ham and light swiss on wheat.  Naked Green Machine (10 oz).  1% Cottage Cheese.
  • … four more Dove Dark Chocolates (Karen put them in my hand–not my fault!  Ok she put three in my hand.  They were gone before I tasted them, so I needed one more…)
  • Giant Leafy Greens salad w/ cherry tomatoes, sugar snap peas, imitation crab meat and light italian dressing with 1% milk

Exercise:

  • 1 mile walk w/ Reilly
  • Spin Class

Ugh.  I need to do some yoga.  After 9 days with virtually no exercise, my legs are tight and sore after spinning. I’m just so tired.  😦 I may yet rally.  We’ll see.  It would burn more calories which would increase my caloric intake which I (of course) exceeded.

Then again I’ve got about 500 calories worth of chocolate in there.  *Sigh*  I didn’t really try to resist them.  They are in the library now.  On my desk.  Staring at me.  Calling to me, saying “I am your favorite kind of chocolate.  Think how creamy and delicious I am.  You know you love me more than Hershey’s dark chocolate, because I am Dove Dark chocolate and I melt in your mouth.”  So then I put one in my mouth and suck to feel it melt away whist coating my tongue in its chocolate glory, dissolving to delicious nothingness.  But then I get greedy and want more chocolatey goodness so I bite into it–another wonderful sensation altogether–and chew and swallow it’s creamy glory.  Then I’m sad I didn’t let it dissolve so I try again.  Same failure.  I should give up.  (You really need to eat those things with a good Pinot Noir anyway, or it’s a complete waste.)

I commented on the hardship of chocolate accessibility on facebook today, and Dosa and Sunny are agreed to continue this TBT hell another two weeks, so I said fuck it and jumped on that bandwagon, too.  At least we’ll be miserable (and skinny bitches) together.  Rowdy I’ve noticed has responded with “likes” and amused comments, but no affirmation of another two weeks.  Piper and Newt are completely ignoring us crazies, though. (Can’t say I blame them.)  Anyway, December 15th.  We can make it.

I have to say, though, if I’m going through this misery another two weeks, Ima fucking do this shit right.  No more damn chocolate all day long.  No more cheat-kends or full cheat days.  I’m not gonna say no cheating, because that’s a recipe for disaster, but I don’t want to go all out ever.  That’s what got me off the bandwagon in the first place.  So cheat meals or cheat treats.  Maybe like one a day.  One glass of wine or one chocolate or if it’s a “cheat day,” one meal or one six pack.  No going nuts. Something like that.  We’ll see how it goes.

As I was warming up for Spin Class this evening, perusing the December Fitness Guide, looking at all the classes I might be able to attend during finals week (when we have half days at school) or during my two week break, I thought “maybe I should TBT another three weeks–til December 21!”  And about 25 minutes later when the sweat started pouring and my legs started shaking I realized that was the crazy talking.  The point is to change habits and move forward positively.  Exercising more.  Eating healthier and less.  Managing those extra “empty” calories.  I’m going longer because I don’t think I’m there yet.  I’m giving myself an extra two weeks to get there.  To remind myself what empty calories can do and that I am capable of avoiding them.

Before this TBT, I didn’t exercise outside of derby.  I won’t stop when TBT is over, and I shouldn’t.  Continuing to exercise after TBT ends doesn’t mean I should extend TBT–I shouldn’t.  I should move forward with these new habits I’ve taught myself.  After the 15th, though, I will be done with this “dieting” bullshit.  I fucking hate it.  Hate.  Loathe.  Ughhh.  But it’s good for me, and I need to learn to manage my caloric intake better.

I think that’s all for now.

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